Mexico City: A Sensation Assault

Eat it, drink it, see it, and believe in the soap with all the superpowers.

I had a local market tour on the second day of my trip. It was my favorite tour of the trip, though I almost missed it due to the notorious Mexico City traffic.

We walked through the labyrinth-like Mercado de La Merced, dodging carts in the narrow aisles, ducking overhead for-sale pinata, trying not to knock down the carefully arranged produces along the way.

Our tour guide was Aremy. She had a backpack with everything you might possibly need -sanitizer, plastic bags, small spoons, wipes. You name it.

I loved that we stopped by a basic tamales truck where the senorita pulled some steaming hot Oaxaca-style tamales from her big metal basket, and had the cafe de olla (pot coffee) inside the market while being surrounded by buckets of chiles with names I had never heard of.

I loved that Aremy already had a deal with a lot of the stalls where we could try anything with our tiny spoons - tasting the exotic mamey sapote (tastes like cooked sweet potato), any of the twenty different types of moles in the bucket, the fungus-infected corn, the Oaxacan-style tamales (much smoother in texture), the many other exotic fruits and vegetables which names I could barely pronounce.

Huitlacoche, corn with fungus

We ended the Mercado de La Merced tour at the allegedly best taco stall, and by then I already knew what made good tacos - freshly-made tortillas, human-sized flame, and con todos (with everything).

The adventure through the Mercado Sonora involved much fewer sensation assaults. It was much more spiritual, religious, or some may say superstition. It was the Walmart of anything cultural, religious, or magical, a place where the desperates, down riddens, or just someone like me (who want to be rich and have a perfect girlfriend) search for their spears or shields to cope with the everyday challenges in life. There were herbal mixtures that claim to cure up to 12 diseases; there were live animals for sacrificial ceremonies for sale.

This can cure nervousness, pressure, insomnia, stress, migraine, anxiety, depression, heart, and arteries.

The toughest choice we had to make was in front of a soap stall, where there were 40 different types of magical soaps available. There were soaps for improving appetite, attracting money, arousing your sexual partners, keeping your dick hard longer, etc. And we had to choose one.

Soaps with super power. You can only choose one.

Aremy came to the rescue. She saved the best soap for last. Jabon Para Todo (the soap for everything) - dominate, winning, eye of providence, attract money, and peace. Now you know that I am using this soap, you would probably not come close to me until my Mexican soap runs out.

The Ultimate Soap - For Everything